How do I get clear on what I want in my life?


Hi Mama, I heard you talk about getting Kick-A$$ Clear on what MY Kick-A$$ Life looks and feels like. You mentioned something about using a list and then doing a Bubble Sort. Could you tell me more about this?


Sure!  Let’s start with the first part of this question…creating a Kick-A$$ Clarity List, since you’ll need this list before you can actually do the Bubble Sort.

How To Create A Kick A$$ Clarity ListOne of the keys to living a Kick-A$$ Life is to figure out what it is, to define it, as clearly as possible for you. One of the easiest ways I’ve found to do this is called a “Bubble Sort”, so named because as you walk through the process what is most important to you “bubbles” to the top and becomes the number 1 priority in your life, at the time you went through the process. It doesn’t mean it it remains your number 1 priority forever and ever. And everyone I’ve ever taken through this process (including me) discovers something new about what they really want or reaffirms they’re on the right track.

Great to know, eh?

Getting clarity uses the same process as when you go to the eye doctor

Most of us (at least in the United States), have done this when we’ve gone to the eye doctor to get our vision checked. Remember the part of the process where the doctor fiddles with some dials and then asks “which is better A or B?”. That is a form of Bubble Sort and with the same result…getting the best prescription for making sure you can see clearly!

So let’s start the process of getting the right prescription for YOUR Kick-Butt Life…This process is essential to helping you take conscious, directed action, instead of unfocused actions that don’t help you create the life of your dreams.

Before you begin

Before you create your Kick-Butt Life List, you’ll need…

  • 10-20 minutes all to yourself
    Don’t spend more than 10-20 minutes creating your list. This list is about your dreams, your passions…your heart’s desires, not what your head thinks is possible. The “what” is where we’re focusing for the moment, not the “how”. The “how” will come later, after we’ve worked together to clarify the “what”.
  • a stack of index cards (or small pieces of paper, sticky notes, or something smaller so you can sort through things later)
  • pen or pencil
    Have fun with this! Write with a favorite pen or maybe use some different colors to create a sense of joy and a sense of adventure.
  • a quiet place to write, away from distractions and interruptions


  1. Center yourself in the here-and-now
  2. Think about the following questions
    “What is really important to me?”
    “What would I do if there were no rules, no limits, no “shoulds”, no “nothing else,” ONLY what I want to do, be or have?
  3. On 3 x 5 card, writeWhen I am living my Kick-AS$ Life, my ideal life, the life I publicly (or secretly!) dream of, I am___________________________You can shorten it to “When I’m living my dream life, I am” or write something similar that is aligned with you.
  4. Using a separate 3 x 5 card for EACH answer that comes up, write 1 thing you want to do/be/or have
    Write your responses until you have at least 10 items OR you’ve been writing for a maximum of 20 minutes
  5. Let your card desck sit for a while…maybe a few hours or the next day
  6. Do a Bubble Sort
    This post explains how to do a Bubble Sort to find out what’s MOST important to you, right now.

Writing Tip

Write your “be, do, have” statements as individual items so you get the best result from your Bubble Sort. Try to stay away from “and” statements that link a bunch of things you want to be, do or have. Also, write the statements as if they are happening right now, are in your life right now. So, for example:

Instead of “I am traveling the world, first class, with my best friend and visiting great historic spots.”


“I am traveling the world.”
“I am visiting great historic spots.”
“I am traveling with my friends” 

The remaining statements can be used to get a clearer picture of what your Kick-A$$ Life is like…and writing them this way helps you do a more accurate comparison.

Till the next time…

love and light, hugs and blessings